Staycation

So, this past week, I took a few days off while my bosses went to a conference in Hawaii.  I looked forward to the time off and had planned lots and lots of productive things to accomplish while at home.  But here it is, Saturday and I have only three more days before I have to go back to work, and I have accomplished almost nothing of what was on my mental to-do list. The following is a list of things I DID do in an effort to feel okay about what I did not do.

• Painted my nails
• Laundry
• Drove to Georgetown to visit my Dad while he stayed a couple of days
• Showed Maddie a little of Georgetown because of all the time I have spent there, I realized that it was her first time ever there. She said that the cathedral at G-town looked like Hogwarts when we were coming across the Key Bridge.
• Dropped off Mac at school in my pjs (when she had it!)
• Picked her up at school (when she had it)
• Went to the grocery store
• Spent some time at the MVA
• Visited Wally World
• Tweeted to make the Twerrible Towel spin
• Wore the same pajama pants for three days (I know, I know... it's gross)
• Read what seems like every blog on the internet
• Mastered some Mahjong skills
• Straightened out an issue with Delta about Mac's orthodontic claim
• Shaved my legs
• Considered coloring my hair, and even bought the color while at Wally World
• Did the dishes a ZILLION times
• Went to Nicholas' 9th Birthday party and had an excellent time with my family
• Went to church
• Adopted a wonderful new dog from the pound
• Played Bubble Buster on my Android phone 
• Did not care in the least what the weather report was
• Made a list on the fridge white board of things I need to do and/or buy for the house
• Ignored the list above
• Made the following items for my family's enjoyment:
• spaghetti sauce with meatballs
• chocolate cake
• Famous Dave's corn muffins
• big ol' pot of chili
• Auntie Anne's pretzels
• banana pudding
• cinnamon raisin bread (which didn't turn out that great)
• fresh baked white bread
• french toast

 OH MY GOODNESS! No wonder I did not accomplish anything on my staycation! Look at how busy I was!  What the heck?!  Well, I feel so much better about the whole thing now! As much as I'd love to continue chronically my amazement at the amazing things I've done this week, I really do have some things I need to do.... right after I check ICanHasCheezburger.com.

The Pittsburgh Steelers

...are going to the Super Bowl.

Thank you, that will be all.

Goodbye Sweet Tessie-Lou

Tribute to a Best Friend

Sunlight streams through window pane onto a spot on the floor.....
then I remember,

it's where you used to lie, but now you are no more.

Our feet walk down a hall of carpet, and muted echoes sound.....
then I remember,

it's where your paws would joyously abound.

A voice is heard along the road, and up beyond the hill,
then I remember,

it can't be yours..... your golden voice is still.

But I'll take that vacant spot of floor and empty muted hall,
and lay them with the absent voice and unused dish along the wall.

I'll wrap these treasured memories in a blanket of my love,
and keep them for my best friend until we meet above.

Author Unknown

Last night, we had to say goodbye to our beloved American Bulldog, Tess.  It was a million times harder than I could have ever imagined it would be.  It happened quickly and we were definitely not prepared, but it was the only decision we could make for her.  Without doing a biopsy, which would have involved an invasive endoscopy procedure under general anesthesia, we cannot be 100% certain, but all clinical indicators and her very rapid decline point to canine nasal adenocarcinoma.  Unfortunately, even if we put her through all the testing money could buy, there is nothing that could have changed the outcome.  We did not want her to suffer any longer knowing this, so we made the very difficult decision to let her go.  We were able to spend time with her and I laid on the floor with her, rubbed her soft ears, looked into her beautiful brown eyes and told her what a good, good, good girl she was and how much we would miss her.

When I first saw Tess at the Humane Society, I never imagined what an imprint she would make on our family and in our hearts.  I can not imagine how anyone could have given up this sweet, quiet, loving girl.  I am happy that we were able to give her a warm home, pets, scratches, treats and love for the last years of her life.  We will hold the memory of these years in our hearts forever.  Our home will be emptier without her.  She gave us so much more than we can ever have given her, unconditional love.  Most of all, I think I will miss going bye bye for a ride in Mommy's car.

You were a good girl Tess and we will miss you immensely.

Lost Lamb

I have been a lost lamb without a flock for a long time now.  I have not stepped into a church for the sole purpose of worship in a very, very long time.  A fact that I have thought about a lot recently.  More specifically, I have thought about with massive amounts if guilt lately.  It comes with the territory of a Catholic upbringing.  Worse yet, I have failed in my promise to raise Maddie in the way of the Catholic Church.  Yikes! One way ticket in that handbasket to Hell, please...

I have told myself that I am a spiritual person and that the Lord does not require regular attendance in church as a demonstration of faith.  I have spent many Sundays of my childhood and teenage years kneeling and standing and repeating and gesturing.  As an adult, I look back I feel like most of what I took away from those masses was a learned routine not religion.  I feel like it was more of a seen and be seen event than worship.

My mother took us to CCD followed by mass every Sunday, but my Dad only went on Easter and Christmas Eve.  Of the Seven Sacraments I have five under my belt, and hopefully it will be a long time before I hit six and seven.  Of the Seven, Maddie has only one.  The one where I promised to raise her in the Catholic faith.  Hmmm, failed that one.  Bad Catholic Mommy.

I find this heavy on my mind because in the very recent past, I have been the recipient of some nudging.  If a higher power has a subtle way of sending signs, I think I'm gettin' 'em. For example, I took Mac and her friend Hailey to a town youth group function couple weekends ago and I found myself standing next to a tall, friendly, older man.  We chit chatted while the kids threw food and he introduced himself as Pastor Bob.  Interesting... Pastor Bob of where?  Well, he has two churches, one down Road X, with an older congregation, and one down Road Y with a much younger congregation.  No, no one with children Maddie's age, and no children's service.  Hmmm, interesting.  Earlier that morning, I overheard Maddie in her room become frustrated with something and say "Jesus Christ!".  Oh boy, she heard it from me over that one.  I would rather have heard her spew the "F" word than that.  Then, tonight, I announced that I was thinking about going to church.  I got out my Bible to show Maddie and inside the front cover, I found Maddie's Baptism certificate.  Not an hour later, my brother Bob, who is Maddie's Godfather, posts a picture of he and Maddie that very day.  Of all the pictures, why that one, from 9 years ago.  Okay, okay, I GET IT already!

My motivation to find a church is to give the gift of faith to Maddie.  I have found it a intimidating task and have no idea where to even start.  How on earth do you cover all that ground?  I don't have answers to the questions that she will inevitably ask.  Once, approaching Easter, she asked my Mom what was so "good" about Good Friday.  I got an earful about that, but I just didn't even know where to start.

I find the 2 nearest Catholic Parishes to us unappealing.  They are just so large! It prompts flashbacks to the Sunday Fashion Shows of my youth.  But how do you choose what church is right?  I don't know, but I plan on figuring this out and having a flock to belong to again.

Thankful: Part 3

Things That are Awesome (in no particular order):

• Family to celebrate with
• Friends to goof around with
• A warm bed to sleep in
• Nourishing food in bellies
• The smell of babies' necks
• Snoring doggies
• Unconditional love
• McDonald's french fries when they are hot with just the right amount of salt
• Hot showers when your tired
• Fuzzy socks
• Baking brownies
• A job that you love
• Emails or texts from people that make you smile
• Finding money in your winter jacket from last winter
• Chapstick
• Hearing "I love you"
• When a song you love but haven't heard in forever comes on the radio
• Ghostbusters 
• Finding out someone else did laundry
• Taco Bell caramel apple empanadas
• Check ups with no cavities
• Warm sweatshirts from the dryer
• The Pittsburgh Steelers
• Spring mornings
• Summer days
• Fall evenings
• Winter nights
• Coffee
• Good books
• Back rubs
• Cherry Jolly Ranchers
• Soft pajamas
• The chance to spend this day with my Family

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thankful: Part 2

Alrighty people.  It's Thanksgiving Eve.  I find myself teetering on the precipice of The Holidays.  I am sooooo NOT ready for the hustle, bustle and crap that comes along with this season.  Not that I don't enjoy some aspects of this time of year.  I like making cookies.  I like the music.  I like the traditions.  And I love, love, love spending time with  my Family and Friends.  Which brings me to Part 2 of "Things I am Thankful For" - My Friends.

My Friends- A Poem

Some friends I have had forever and a day

Some friends are ones I have made along the way

Some friends are ones I rarely get to see

But every one of you means so much to me.

When we get together, we spill our guts

And usually eat while griping about our butts

We've talked, laughed, hugged and wept

Always knowing confidences are kept.

I feel so blessed and thankful today

The right words I can not always say

So know, friends, that until I've perished

Each of you will forever be cherished.

I would have written more, but Hallmark was calling begging me to begin my new career in card writing.  I hope that you all enjoyed my tribute and I would ask that you refrain from nominating me as poet laureate.  I've got enough crap to do to get ready for the holidays. 

Love you, Ladies- you know who you are ;o)

Thankful: Part One

As Thanksgiving approaches, there is no shortage of reminders out there about how thankful I should be.  Hmmm, that didn't exactly come out right, but I'm too lazy to backspace and start it over.  However, I am thankful.  I just wish that I didn't need to be reminded about it.  It makes me feel guilty that I have taken so much for granted during every other time of year.

So, without further ado, I submit to you the first in a series of "Things I am Thankful For".  Today, I am thankful for *drum roll please*  My Family.  My family is pretty awesome.  The one I grew up with and the one I made for myself.  Let me tell you a little something about them!


My Parents
My Mom and Dad have been married for 42 years and they more in love today than they were back then.  Their marriage has been a shining example for us to follow.  I used to be weirded out by them being together when I was in middle school and most of my friends' parents were divorcing. ("Is that your parents holding hands walking down the mall?!" "Who? Where? I don't see them... Let's go this way...") I always felt a little like I was a generation behind everyone else in the ideals, standards and morals my parents instilled in us- it felt old fashioned.  Today, as I raise my own family, I am thankful for all that they have done.

My Brothers
Bob- The oldest. The wise.  The One in Charge.  The Rockstar.  Bob is 5 years older than me.  He is savvy, smart and I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of his sharp, but fair, anger.  When I was in high school he let me drive his cars to school when mine broke down, which was frequently.  My cat had a litter of kittens on his bed and he never even complained, even though he didn't really like cats.  I adore and idolize him.  He married his high school sweetheart, Kyra, and then she became Family.  When she asked me to be in the wedding, I was beyond honored.  Kyra is sweet, funny and quiet. But when it counts, she speaks up.  When in high school, the joke was that Kyra could burn water, but she is actually one of the best cooks I know.  She always make a TON of really great food for family gatherings and that's my kind of gal!  She is a phenomenal Mother.  I am envious of her patience.  Together, Bob and Kyra gave us Nicholas, blue eyed, handsome and full of energy.  I once was asked to participate in a karate belt ceremony for him and I was very proud to do so.  He charms the pants off me every time I see him and I predict lots of wonderful things in his future!

Tony- The middle child.  Independent. Artistic.  Pineapple-ly (prickly on the outside, but sweet on the inside).  Tony has held me down and tickled me until I peed myself.  He has dislocated my arm.  He has passed me in the hallway and punched me for no apparent reason.  In fairness, there probably was a reason, but it could not possibly have been something I did.  I do not hesitate for one second to say that I would lay my life down for him.  Once, he set a bomb off in our basement and managed to keep it a secret from my parents for 20 years.  He is quietly brilliant and the most like my Father out of the three of us.  He married Paula, and she became Family.  Paula is strong, thoughtful and practical.  She changed Tony into a better man and even after all these years, we still remark on it.  Paula has been through much adversity and I admire her tenacity and fight.  Together, Tony and Paula have given us Broc and Garret.  Handsome boys who are growing faster than any of us can keep up with, and able to bring smiles to everyone the meet.  Two different boys who have so much to look forward to and who are loved by so many!


My Husband
Jeffrey.  Proud.  Hard working.  Tough.  Handsome.  Stubborn.  I met Jeff playing in a dart league at Kozy Korner in Mt. Airy.  He has a great butt.  Back in "the day" when guys wore pants that you could actually SEE their butts in, he had a really, really great butt.  We have been through a lot together.  And it has not always been easy, but once we remembered love, it always seemed to work out.  He had a family life and childhood that was the polar opposite of mine.  But somehow he has overcome that and has become a loving, supportive husband and father.  He gets up, most times 7 days a week, in the wee hours of the morning to go to work to support us.  And he always comes home (that's for you babe).  During our wedding ceremony, I was crying and had a nice snot stream from my nose to my upper lip.  When it came time to "kiss the bride", I warned him, but he came in full force regardless.  I love that man.  Marrying Jeff gave me Brittany.  I cannot tell you about her right now because it is so painful at this precise moment that it may cause my chest to split open, and I don't feel like cleaning up that mess.

My Daughter
Madalyn. Mac. Stinky Pants.  Smarty Pants.  Sarcastic.  Skinny.  Tall.  Brown Eyed.  A never ending source of pride.  Maddie is named after my Mom.  We didn't tell anyone what her name was going to be until after she was born, even though we knew almost as soon as we knew we were going to have a girl.  Maddie is like a sponge, soaking up knowledge and information from any possible source.  She forgets almost nothing.  She plays the string bass in the 5th grade orchestra.  Tiny kid, huge instrument.  But that's Maddie.  Never does what is expected and always finds a way to make it seem like it is the most natural thing in the world.  She has beautiful huge brown eyes that captured my heart the minute I saw them the day she was born.  Mac is already making college plans, but we told her she can go to McDaniel and commute.  When it comes time for her to leave home, you will find me curled up in the fetal position in my closet.  But it won't be for a while, since she will be a commuter to McDaniel and be going to school for a long, long time.  However long it takes to get 7 masters and a Ph.D.

Oh Yes.  I am Thankful.

I am quite Thankful, indeed.